Friday, August 13, 2010

Musings About Musial and My Life as a Story


I was reading Sports Illustrated last night – not the most recent issue (I still hadn’t finished the previous one) – when I again looked at my life and thought I wanted more.

When Stan Musial is on the cover, one has to read the article. I’d never known much about him before, except that I’d never heard one bad word about him. Sure, Babe Ruth was too fat, Joe DiMaggio hung out with celebrities, Mickey Mantle got injured too much, Willie Mays should never have played for the Mets, Ty Cobb played dirty, Pete Rose gambled on his own team and Ted Williams got cryogenically frozen for Pete’s sake. Musial is baseball's all-around good-guy. He played his entire career for the St. Louis Cardinals, won three World Series Rings and was known for never turning down an autograph. In the article, HOF pitcher Robin Roberts was quoted as saying "none of us are perfect. We all disappointed someone from time to time. I guess. Well, all of us except one... Musial."The article told stories about his friendliness, his genuineness, and his respect of others.
"He just believed that that every man had the right to be treated with dignity."
A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I Learned While Editing My Life Last night I was also reading Donald Miller's blog. I'd fallen behind and was attempting to catch up as a break from my directed reading (I'd read 150 pages that day alone about corporate capitalism reconstruction during the Roosevelt and Taft administrations...). Anyways, Miller had written this entry about his friend Bob, a fellow he'd written substantially about in his book A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I Learned While Editing My LifeThis guy is amazing. I couldn't do him justice by writing about him, so you'll have to check the story out for yourself. The blog post reminded me about the feelings I had when I read the book last October, during Fall Week of Worship. The book discussed Don's change in thinking regarding life. He began to see his life as a story and realized he didn't like the story he was living. It made me realize that I too didn't like the story I was living. That was a good week if I remember correctly. I tried to live a better story. I can't remember any particulars besides a good chat with speaker Terry Johnsson and reading this book.

Reading about Musial and Bob back-to-back made me realize that, like Don, I didn't like my story very much either. Granted summer school isn't glamorous in general and I'm far behind in my directed reading so that takes due diligence, but I just feel as though my life is boring. I feel like I've been less friendly, aloof really, and I'm sick of it. I want people to say about me what Musial's friend Dick Zitzmann said about him: "He loves making people happy." Now that makes for a good story.

Friday, August 6, 2010

A Case For Reading

I've always loved reading. Whether it was Swift Arrow in the first grade, Sports Illustrated, or a good John Grisham novel (i.e. The Runaway Jury), I've always been enthralled by a good read. Each Friday evening growing up, my family would gather in the living room (or whichever room had a fireplace...) and read for several hours. This was a great tradition, one I hope to continue.

I say all this because of a blog post I read today by Donald Miller. I was shocked by the statistics on American readership. Apparently when people don't have to read, they don't. Seriously. I mean, I have a few roommates who never read, but even they've read Three Cups of Tea.

As a future teacher, the statistics concern me. 1/3 of high school graduates won't read a book again. And (this shocked me even more...!), 42% of college grads won't either. I'd conversely be interested to see statistics on video game usage... I realize that Americans have far more entertainment options than in previous years, but books contain relevant information. Video games (and even my beloved sports) are frivolous with absolutely zero meaning. This shows a disinterest in lifelong learning.

When I was 10, there was an old, retired doctor in our church who would volunteer for the juniors' Sabbath School class, especially teaching nature. I've never forgotten him because he had so much knowledge. Though I didn't know it at the time, he took college courses every semester at the local community college, just for fun and to keep his mind active.

Not every person needs to take college classes for their entire life, but I am nervous when I see a general disinterest in lifelong reading. How can this be averted? How can I instill a lifelong interest in reading (or at least learning in general) in my students? I have no easy solutions (especially since I have only one year of teaching as an SM), but I would think the main solution is to make classes relevant and to suggest specific books that would pique students' interest. I hope this concerns other too and that American culture strives to bring reading back to its prior prominence.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Why I’m Proud of Walla Walla University

I’m a 5th-generation Seventh-day Adventist. I’m about to become a 3rd-generation teacher. Countless aunts, uncles and cousins have been or are currently teaching in the SDA school system. Until I was 18, I was sure what I believed. I was a stereotypical Adventist kid. It was then that I had to work through some issues, interestingly enough regarding perfection, before resuming my place in the church. It was then that I went as a student missionary to Pohnpei, where I taught high school Bible and history, was ordained as an elder and became essentially the youth pastor. Though difficult at times, it was a positive experience. My SM year isn’t the point right now. It’s merely the beginning of this story.

Since my return, I struggled to find a place in American Adventism. I felt unneeded after having been relied upon so heavily in spiritual matters. I was excited to return to “minister” at Walla Walla University. However, I struggled to find a spot in ministry. It seemed no one needed help. I realize now I wasn’t looking in the right places. But discouragement led slowly to a lack of time spent with God in general. Within a year, I woke up one morning not knowing if I believed in God at all. This was especially nerve-wracking considering my history and my status as a religion major.

Being a student at an SDA school, I clammed up about my doubts. I merely told inquirers that I was struggling a bit and received several “I’ll be praying for you” statements. I was cynical. I expected no one here to understand and to be shunned for doubting and lose any job prospects in SDA education if I even mentioned my thoughts. My few attempts at sharing had received mixed results, with some friends supportive and others critical.

Besides being confused, I was unhappy. I tried to mask it, but it was probably quite evident. At least it was to my religion advisor, Alden Thompson. I’d gone into his office only to discuss my class schedule. However, he wished to discuss my spirituality. I was skeptical, yet he pushed on. So, I let it all out. This made me nervous. I was divulging doubt to a “rock” of Adventism. I didn’t know what to expect. Instead of criticism, I received genuine concern and interest. This was the beginning of weekly meetings to discuss God and life. Every Friday at 8 a.m. from January to June I met in his office, minus the few times mental lapses allowed me an hour extra sleep (combined with an apologetic e-mail).

I’m sure I frustrated Dr. Thompson each week. Not only was I not readily convinced of Christianity and a personal God, but my reasoning was redundant and I wasn’t trying as hard as I’d promised. However, he kept inviting me back. He was rather persistent. He e-mailed me quotes, suggested reading material and always promised that he’d be praying for me. This time I believed it. He told me his story with God and assigned me to discuss my doubts with other trusted faculty. It was all helpful.

Simultaneously, two religion classes had a profound impact on my life: Christian Ethics and Spirituality & Discipleship. Drs. Pedrito Maynard-Reid and Jon Dybdahl were not only failed to criticize my doubts, but offered to listen as well.

This is where this blog’s title comes in. I had certain expectations of Adventist education. I expected staunch fundamentalism. I expected to be essentially excommunicated for verbalizing doubt. However, that was not my experience. I was encouraged by each faculty member with whom I discussed my doubts. I was made to feel comfortable in discussion yet uncomfortable with my state of doubt.

I believe I would have been happy no matter where I’d gone to college. It’s simple: I like learning and I like people. However, I doubt I would have been so well received anywhere else. I was respected. This is why I’m proud to be affiliated with Walla Walla University. I wouldn’t change my experience for anything.

I’m still not entirely sure what I believe. However, I find myself stepping closer and closer towards Christianity each day. I want to be more than a hopeful deist. I want purpose. I want community. I want to be someone like Jesus. I want to believe He was the Son of God. There is nothing more positive in this world than the biblical story of Christ. I want to believe.

I’m curious to see where I end up. Join me in continued searching.