Pancakes To Go and Jose Lopez

This past Sunday, I drove the four hours from Walla Walla to Hayden Lake for the Maniscalco/Neisner wedding. It was great to see so many people and share in a happy occasion.

On the drive, I had the fortune of listening to a Mariners game, a game in which they actually won... Anyways, on the way, I heard a radio commercial I'd heard before. It was advertising a restaurant chain called Pancakes-To-Go. I thought it had to be a joke. Who would ever come up with such a horrible idea...?!?!?! And in the commercial, it proceeded to discuss all the health risks of the company, right before a catchy slogan. I've since googled the restaurant and nothing comes up. Seriously. Try it. I used images, maps, all of the above. Nothing. I'm guessing it's a hoax. But I'd heard the ad before and since. Who would pay advertising money for a non-existent company?

As I said, the Mariners won the game. Third baseman Jose Lopez actually performed well. I'd been waiting for such a performance simply so that a team would want to trade for him. All the stars were seemingly aligned. Solid performance. And the Detroit Tigers just lost both their second and third basemen. Perfect. Well, maybe not. The next day, he gets injured, limiting his trade value. He'll probably still be a Mariner after the July 31 trade deadline, meaning one more underachieving Mariner who keeps his job...

On the bright side, the Walla Walla Sweets won tonight... and my buddy Craig even grabbed a foul ball... what a great sport!

Perspectives

I finally had some "me time" today. As an only child, I've fought to have as much social interaction as possible. However, we all need time to disconnect from the world. Today was that day.

It taught me something, perhaps more of a reminder.

I'm broken.

Very broken.

Lost.

I have been for awhile now. The world doesn't know, but I am. I'm lost spiritually and I feel as though I lack direction. I haven't "experienced" God in nearly 2 years. I go to church each Sabbath. I hang out mostly with the "flock." In all appearance, I'm still a good little Adventist boy. I want more. I want to be more than just a hopeful deist.

So, I decided to dig again. I've said I'm trying to find God before. I've had good stints for a few weeks and maybe even a month. I want a considerable dig. The plan is to read everything by Rob Bell in the next month (each for the 2nd time), followed by Donald Miller (also for the 2nd time) before reading The Case For Christ and then maybe something by an atheist. I want to know what I believe. I have no expectations. I just want to experience God and don't want to stop trying to find Him.

I started Velvet Elivs tonight.


It's already forcing me to rethink the expectations I thought I didn't have.

This quote hit me like a ton of bricks:

"The moment God is figured out with nice neat lines and definitions, we are no longer dealing with God. We are dealing with somebody we made up. And if we made him up, then we are in control (25)."

I don't know what to expect, but even subconsciously I want to be in control. That is difficult to give up, especially when my beliefs have been stripped bare.

My perspectives have changed so much in two years, in five years and ten. I'm curious to see how they'll change in the next two, five, ten years...

Blogging? Really?

Blogging.

I never thought I'd get here. Really. Merely a few years ago, I privately mocked those who wrote their musings online. While a student missionary, I refused a blog and instead utilized mass e-mails, because those were different somehow...

Now I read blogs daily. Well, baseball blogs... Does that count? I find myself often checking other friends' blogs fairly regularly as well as spiritual mentors Alex Bryan and Donald Miller. Blogging seemed to help them express themselves. I too want to better express myself. So here I am, hoping that this will be an acceptable medium. Whether anyone reads this or not doesn't matter. I'll try to post something at minimum once a week.

Expect topics ranging anywhere from spiritual searching to baseball to Walla Walla University to my mission year to Camp MiVoden to journalism to whatever. I hope I make sense. I hope I'm worth reading. I hope I live a life worth writing about.

Let the game begin. Put me in coach, I'm ready to play... today... center field...